Religious factual programming: a drinking game
Down a shot every time…
- There’s a sunset, sunrise, beam of light etc.
- There’s a flickering candle.
- Islam is represented by a mosque dome, man with a long beard or woman in niqab/hijab.
- Christianity is represented by a crucifix, people singing with their arms open or a cathedral.
- Catholicism is represented by the Pope or mass.
- Hinduism is represented by statues or icons of gods.
- Buddhism is represented by monks in orange robes or gold Buddhas.
- Judaism is represented by Orthodox Jews or people at the wailing wall.
- Scientology is represented by some strange techonological implements. An extra shot for Tom Cruise, two if it’s Tom Cruise on the Oprah sofa.
- Someone goes on a ‘journey’. Double if the journey is physical as well as metaphorical.
- There’s a sweeping shot of English countryside, with a church or cathedral in the middle.
- There’s a sweeping shot of Jerusalem with the Dome of the Rock being prominent.
- The voice-over mentions ‘moderate’ religious people.
- The voice-over mentions fundamentalist Islam. Double shots if this is linked to terrorism, triple if linked to Saudi Arabia.
- The voice-over mentions fundamentalist Christianity. Double shots if the term ‘evangelical’ is used, triple if linked to America. Down the whole bottle if George W Bush is mentioned.
- Every time a wacky ‘internet preacher’ is shown.
- Someone says something along the lines of ‘well that’s what you believe and that’s alright for you’.
- Richard Dawkins is wheeled out.
- Creationism vs evolution is mentioned. Don’t drink if someone happens to believe in both evolution and God/a god etc, as they will clearly be shown to be lying later. It is apparently impossible to believe in both.
- Black African Christianity is portrayed as sinister.
- Tribal religions are shown as having lots of skulls, blood, animal sacrifices etc.
- Traditional music of the country shown is played. This will, of course, only happen in programmes about the East.
- The interviewer asks religious people about their views on any of the following: sex, drugs, drink, partying, celebrities.
- A Channel 4 documentary opens with some line about Britain supposedly being a secular country. Two shots if this is accompanied by footage of people in a busy city street.
- There is some sort of conclusion about how we should all love each other and be tolerant but not be extreme etc.
- Stop drinking if you see any Sikhs. You may be hallucinating.